How often do you think about your bed? For me, it starts creeping into my thoughts about the time yawns become the main part of the evening conversation. If thinking about beds is yawn-inducing, does that make it a boring subject? Or maybe relaxing? (yeah, that sounds right)
So I start to think about relaxing in bed, and the yawns take over my brain. Next thing you know, I’m tucked in up to my neck and snoring away. (I can only go off my wife’s insistence that I snore. I’ve never heard it.) I’m one of those “my head hits the pillow and I’m out” kind of sleepers. For some reason, my wife has to turn on the television and set the volume at a million to go to sleep. It’s almost like she’s trying to drown out some noise.
Anyway, I don’t think about the bed until it’s time to go off to la-la land (Not that stupid movie, but the real la-la land where I can fly and all the women think I’m hot). I never thought about the bed being an issue until one evening a few weeks ago when my wife asked me about my back.
I’ve had back problems for the last couple of years. I suffered from a bulging disc (which is better now), and as part of the doctor’s workup found out I have arthritis in my back. So my back hurts most days, to one degree or another, and I just try to ignore it. I gave her my standard answer, but this time she didn’t let it go. “It’s the bed,” she said.
“The bed?” My writer brain immediately went off on a tangent. The bed is part of a conspiracy to take over the world. Once we’re asleep, it sends an inter-dimensional signal to its lizard overlords who open a portal to our bedroom and manipulate our backs. That way we won’t be able to fight back when they invade.
“I think it’s worn out.”
Oh, yeah it could be that too. I mean, we bought it 18+ years ago. There are divots where we sleep. Maybe it could be the bed is worn out.
So we bought a new mattress about a week ago, and wow, what a difference a bed makes! Who knew you could wake up in the morning without a backache?
If your bed is more than ten years old, and your back has been giving you problems, you may want to replace it (The mattress, not your back, unless you have cyborg fantasies). You can fly with the hot chicks every night (don’t tell my wife), and wake up with a (relatively) pain-free back.
Of course, it takes me a few more minutes to fall asleep now, because I keep one eye peeled for those inter-dimensional lizards (just in case).